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Today was one of the lowest-performance day of my whole internship at Make. Despite sleeping early yesterday, I fell asleep more times today than I could recall. The worse was that I didn’t know when I’d drift off because it will just happen.

So, the songs I was hearing on my iTunes playlist didn’t seem to connect at all. I’d listen into a verse, drift off, and when I came back expecting a chorus to happen, another song was already playing.

No, I’m not on drugs.

The only conclusion I can give besides sleep apnea was jet lag. Since I slept earlier and woke up earlier than usual, it’s the only logical explanation. Tonight, I’m going to sleep at the same time again, I just hope I’ll wake up fresher tomorrow.

Oh. I had three episode of animated dreams yesterday night. It was a mix of Gundam SEED and Hayao Miyazaki at the same time. I was piloting a Gundam, just that whenever I got blown up, I’d wake up for a while, then go back to sleep and continue fighting again. By the third time it happened, I realize it was a futile fight, and I willed hard for the METEOR dock to enter my dream, and to my surprise, it did. (For non-gundam-fans, this was it.)

The amazing thing was, the GUI inside the Gundam console was EXACTLY the same as the anime (1:19), sound effects and all.

With that, ALL the stupid enemies went down.

And I woke up with a splitting headache.

If I am not picking up your calls, or replying your SMSes, I’m sorry kay. Someone at home took my bill with an intention to pay it, but held on to it for three months. Then Starhub warned me that my service will get cut soon, and I stupidly ignored the SMSes until they finally cut me.

After I paid my bill online via internet banking, they still haven’t activated me. It’s been a day (minus Sunday, which is not exactly a working day).

I guess its time to switch to Singtel soon. Oh man, I only hope their iPhone plans are reasonable. Rogers Canada screwed up with their stupid plans, and I hope Singtel doesn’t do the same.

As we grow up, we lose the sense and desire for hopes and dreams. We don’t know why, but somewhere along that road we’ve convinced ourselves that what we have now is as good as it gets. Occasionally, we get little longings and ideals of perfection and bliss, but we dismiss it too quickly, thinking that it’s unreal and unachievable.

Just because this is a common experience for many people (sometimes even us) doesn’t mean we have to fit in and accept defeat!

If there is no such thing as a “happily ever after”, why then do our hearts and souls resonate with such longing and desire when we see storybook endings happen? It almost feels like a distant memory from the Old Days.

Generally, we humans are discontented with the world and know that something somewhere is wrong. We dream of something better, and have ideals about where the perfect place should be. Could that desire alone be a hint that we were made for somewhere / something else?

I strongly believe so.

Please don’t lose that hope, don’t lose that child in you. Remember your Maker; remember the One who fought, sacrificed, and came back to life for you and I.

There is a happily ever after. And thankfully, it is not found in this world (not the fullness of it anyway).

Seek and you shall find.